FriendZone

Friendzone Tees

Sometimes, you’re friends with a girl for, like, a whole week, and she’s still not interested in sleeping with you!

I know! It’s like they don’t understand the only reason we’re friends with them is for sex!

Yea, that’ll do the trick.

Too bad his lady-friends aren’t interested in “Doing something”.

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The Gamer Comedy that Rage-quits

Pwned! The Gamer Comedy that Gives
(AKA “Pwned! The Ultimate Geek Anthem Film”)

This man needs a mere $250,000 to film a Gamer Comedy. It’s a comedy film by gamers, for gamers!

It contains fresh new gags like this parody of the Star Wars opening scroll :

But this isn’t just a comedy, it also has an important message!

Oh boy. A parody of “gamer life” that also teaches us an important message about bullying.

When the internet didn’t immediately start throwing money at them for this obviously brilliant concept, they changed the name of their project from “The Ultimate Geek Anthem Film” to “The Gamer Comedy that Gives“, and explained that they would give 100% of their profits to charity, including …

When even this didn’t work, they did the only thing they could think of : RAGE-QUIT!

Don’t worry, they’ve relocated to IndieGoGo!
(By the way, that’s not a comb-over, his hair just does that.)

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Futile Furry Fuel Fantasy

Furry Fuel!

Ok, apparently if you’re a furry you’re not content drinking a regular energy drink. (Not even a “Red Bull“?)


Ok, so essentially it’s just Soda pop, right?


The energy drink looks pretty normal besides the label (pictured above), but the project included this interesting “stretch goal”.




Let’s see how that turned out.

Suspended by Kickstarter? But Why?

For the answer to that question, let’s check out the list of Prohibited Kickstarter Projects :

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Lone Bobblehead Theory

Lee Harvey Bobblehead

Celebrate the assassination of one of the USA’s most beloved presidents with a whimsical bobblehead!

It makes me happy for humanity, that even on an election year, people weren’t crazy enough to back this project.

All that said, they did do a good job of capturing him in bobble form.

It’s the perfect conversation starter at the next militia meeting.

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Book to Theme Park : Candlelight

Book to Theme Park Candlelight : A Science Fiction love story

Josh Kostelecky is a man with a plan.

It’s a bit complicated, but I’ve taken the liberty of illustrating it.

First you write three books. Then you Build a theater. Then you build a movie studio. Then you build a theme park. Then you ride the roller coaster all day long, because you've earned it, man. You've earned it.


So how’d that turn out?

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CANdleholders.

CANdleholder “A creative way to add light to your life.”

If I may get philosophical for a moment, I’ve always thought of cans as not specifically candle-holders, but just “Holders”. You know, in general. I mean : They’re cans, so you can put stuff in them.


Ooo! Sounds classy already! Let’s see how they turned out.


Hmm… Well, I guess they have sort of a … “industrial” aesthetic going on?

How’d they do?

Oh. Ouch.

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Project Disaster : Hanfree iPad Accessory

This one’s a cautionary tale about the risks of Kickstarter. As awesome as it is to be able to “kickstart” new projects and businesses, it’s a sad fact that some projects won’t succeed no matter how hard you kick them. (How’s that for an over-extended metaphor?)

The idea here is pretty straightforward. The Hanfree is a really tall and really flexible iPad stand.

So you can use your iPad as a music stand.

Or you could use your iPad if you’re laying on the couch.

Or, you could use your iPad if, for some reason, you were in your bed, on your hands and knees.

The Kickstarter campaign was a success! They raised $35,004, and were rated one of the Top Ten Kickstarter Projects of 2011 by TomsGuide.com and a couple of other blogs.

So what went wrong?

Poor math, poor management, and poor money handling.

Basically, the creator, who has the superhero name “Seth Quest”, completely misjudged how much money would be needed to manufacture the item by a factor of about 10x. So when the money ran out he sold his car, and when that money ran out he asked his employees to work for free. Believe it or not, his employees didn’t refuse outright, but they asked for partial ownership of his company in exchange for their free work. He refused, and that was that. Project over. Company bankrupt.

About six months after the campaign ended, posted an update :

As you can imagine, many of his backers pitched a fit. Imagining Kickstarter to be some sort of store or skymall-like catalog, they were astonished and infuriated that the start-up business that they had invested in had failed. (To be fair, Seth Quest did encourage this way of thinking by repeatedly describing the pledges as “pre-orders“.) Check out this classy blog by an angry backer.

Unfortunately, Seth Quest responded to these angry comments in a very sleazy, unprofessional, and possibly even illegal way : By trying to hide! That’s right, he deleted all his email accounts, and even tried to remove his awesome-sounding name from the Kickstarter page!

To make a long story short, (Too late!) several of the Kickstarter backers are now suing Mr Seth Quest, but don’t expect to get much money out of him, since he doesn’t actually have any money.


This story is an import lesson for everyone involved in Kickstarter. Some people just aren’t prepared for the reality of manufacturing a product. If you’re thinking about backing a project, don’t be fooled by a slick prototype, do your research and decide if you trust these people to actually be able to do what they’re claiming! (Or just treat it like a gamble.)

If you’re thinking about starting a project, please do a lot of research, and figure out exactly how much money you’re going to need. Talk to people who have done similar projects and find out about all those expenses you haven’t thought of. It’s good to be confident, but be realistic too. The last thing you want is to spend the next few years hiding from hundreds or even thousands of angry people.

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Project Luna : Marginally Legal Plushes

Moon Plush

These people are trying to raise $5,000 to manufacture plush toys in the shape of an adorable pony named Luna.

Now, I know what you’re thinking, but you’d be wrong! This isn’t a My Little Pony project at all!

See? This is a plush toy about a cat who turned into a pony! Completely innocent! It’s certainly a legally distinct, completely original character, right?

Why, I’ll bet the creators of this Kickstarter would be shocked to learn that Hasbro’s “Friendship is Magic“, by shear chance, has a very similar character, also named Luna!


Woa! What a coincidence!

(Incidentally, While Hasbro’s Princess Luna accessorizes with a black tiara, this Luna accessorizes with a … DJ headset? … Made of carbon-fiber? … For some reason?)




LATE BREAKING UPDATE : After I wrote this post, the creator of this Kickstarter responded to the obvious accusations that this was blatant intellectual property theft.
Click Here to Read it.
I didn’t highlight any parts of it, because the whole thing is just so hilarious and adorably child-like. It’s funny enough that they’re intentionally refusing to understand the concept of “derivative works”, which is generally understood to prohibit character rip-offs like this, but what I find really funny is the way they’re intentionally misspelling “Copyright” and “Trademark”. No doubt that is supposed to make some sort of point that can only be understood by the anti-copyright evangelists at ChillingEffects,com (The site they linked to “explain” copyright.).


LATER BREAKING UPDATE : Uh oh! One of the backers has cracked the code!


Click here for an update to this project.

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