There are a lot of children’s books on Kickstarter. I mean a lot, and most of them are frankly pretty dire. I could probably fill this entire blog with nothing but children’s books, but I don’t because that would be boring, and even more mean spirited than this site usually is.
However, when you compare yourself to Doctor Seuss I expect great things. Anyone with the gall to compare themselves to one of the great masters in the field had better be able to back it up. So with that in mind, let’s dig into “The Star of Soreals”
I’m going to ignore this guy’s description of the book. It has a few typos, but whatever.
Ugh! Make it stop. This is weapons-grade bad poetry right here.
It’s clearly trying, and failing to hit a poetic meter, but I can’t figure out which one. (Compare to Seuss’s favorite meter, the sing-songy anapestic tetrameter.)
And the rhymes! Are you kidding me with those rhymes?!? “Interact / Matterfact”? “wants / thoughts”? “wants / flaunt”?!? THOSE DON’T EVEN WORK!
Ok, ok, there’s more to being “a Doctor Suessian style” than the poetry, the good doctor was also known for his wonderful pen and ink illustrations. So what kind of art does this masterpiece have for us?
Oh, for crying out loud! I give up.