This man needs an Escort

Losing one’s virginity to an Escort By: Claude Gayle London

This man is raising money to hire an ‘escort’ to lose his virginity.

His all-or-nothing funding goal is £25,000 (about $38,000).

£25,000?!? Wow. Being a hooker in the UK must be a pretty sweet gig.

"From my perspective, sexual politics is overwhelmingly in favour of women.  In my humble opinion and in all great men's too, no women can say they have never dated or had sex regardless of how much they can claim to have been hurt in their lives.  I stand, a victim of women.  What is life without intimate love, oh dear? I will forever now have unequal relationships with women if I do have any.  No relationship will last."
Ok, I’m starting to get an idea of the problem here, but let’s press on.

The project comes with eight illustrations, and it’s a weird collection.
Commander Spock

  • There’s a couple of inspirational posters
  • an advertisement to raise handicap awareness
  • An meme-style “BEST GIRLFRIEND EVER” photograph of a naked girl playing MarioKart
  • A publicity photo of Star Trek’s Commander Spock
  • A photograph of a woman with something being poured on her face. (I think it’s honey, but it could be some other yellow fluid.)

…And the Video

This video is very confused. I get that he’s trying to be Charlie Chaplin. … but that’s about all I understand.
If he’s trying to make it look like an old-time silent, why is there both color and singing? If he’s not trying to make it look old-timey why is the color so horrible?

Honest to Internet, when I first saw the preview, the messed up colors made me think this was a white guy in black-face makeup!

But wait! There’s MORE!

Don’t miss his OTHER campaign to raise £1.5 Million (about $2¼ Million) to start a new religion based on the prophesies of everyone’s favorite 16th century nut-bag.
A new religion based on nostradamus By: Claude Gayle London
Don’t worry, he’s set up a webpage to explain it all.

See Also…

Flying House.

3d Render of the Flying House
Here’s a project that belongs in a steampunk comic book instead of actual reality. (where we live.)

This man needed £6,000 (a bit over $9,000) to complete phase one of his three-part plan to build a “flying bachelor pad”.

a fully-functional, "bachelor-pad" style gondola that hangs beneath two massive whale-form Zeppelins. The living area will be almost entirely composed of a single-piece, vegetable-plastic superstructure that will be made in a super-sized, self-created 3d printer, and the Zeppelins will be made from organic hemp-canvas. Other components will include recycled glass, and organic bamboo.
 The entire structure will be fully flight-capable, and fully steerable too - always important...

FlyingHouse_02
So, this isn’t an art project. This guy honestly wants to build a house-sized dirigible. (Then fly it to Burning Man?)

You know, there are reasons people don’t actually use dirigibles.
FlyingHouse_03
First of all, it takes a lot of helium to lift something. He doesn’t give the dimensions, so we can’t check his math, but he’s an artist, so we can safely assume he did the math wrong. There’s no way those gas-bags are big enough to lift the bachelor-gondola. There’s a reason the Hindenburg was 800 feet long!

Secondly, Even if it gets off the ground, there’s no way those tiny little fins or those rinky-dink electric fans are going to going to be able to control this thing.

What you’ve got here is a small bachelor-pad attached to two pretty, but inefficiently shaped hemp balloons, that probably won’t even get off the ground, but if it does it’ll be blown away by the wind.

Reaction

This is a dumb project, but it was a wonderful dream. How did the funding public react to it?
The prom video is so horrible I didn't get to the end. I don't care about your stupid bird. Your project will fail and you will die of cancer and aids.
Ansis Māliņš seems like a wonderful person. (and if you look closely, you’ll notice that he’s also a Brony.)

Roundup : Minecraft Rip-offs begging for money.

Yesterday I mocked Haxel for being rip-off of the break-out hit game “Minecraft”.

Turns out there are a lot of lazy would-be game designers trying to jump on the “Cubes are easy to program” bandwagon. (And asking for your money to do it!)

I’ll bet these are the same fools who complain that mainstream commercial games are “Too unoriginal“.