Cat Erotica. Catrotica.

  I want to Create a 2015 calendar of Cat Erotica.

This man wants to make calendar of “cat erotica” and he didn’t once use the pun “Kitty Porn”. According to his facebook, he’s doing this because a gypsy fortune teller told him to. I guess they have gypsies in Montana?

Who doesn't love a cat photo?   Now add the excitement of a tastefully placed cat teat in that photo and you got yourself some Cat Erotica.

How titillating.

A copy of this sexy calendar will set you back $25, but if that’s too rich for your blood, you can get your named tattooed on the photographer for only $10.

I’m not sure what that has to do with the project, or why you would want that, but hey, ten dollars is a bargain!

kittyporn_05kittyporn_03

Fun fact : , To get 10,000 names tattooed on your flesh between September 19th, and the end of December, you’d need to get 625 names per week.

kittyporn_04
He’s off to a great start!

Digital Ditties for Doggies.

petPhone_01
Yes! Finally!

Is your cat or dog stressed out? Either by loud noises, or just by the crushing ennui of having the instincts of a predator in a comfy suburban home? No problem! Play that domesticated beast some soothing tunes!

petPhone_03

Oh, good point. If my cat tuned the stereo to the Country station, I’d probably have him put down.

He’s going to need his own 4gb mp3 player!

For the, admittedly quite reasonable, price of $98, you can get fluffy his own mp3 player that he (or his owner) can load up with the mp3s that he likes. Hours of non-stop doggy music, without bothering his human owners!

petPhone_pooch
Rock on, pooch! Rock on.

Friday Quickies.

I used to Like Kickstarter

*Sigh*. Ever since Kickstarter stopped screening their projects this is just getting too easy. Kickstarter is now just as bad as IndieGoGo. There’s more dumb projects than real projects!
 Cat Capes!  by Amy  We want to make capes for our 3 cats. We're convinced that they're constantly jumping off of furniture in an attempt to fly.
Really? Maybe this is a joke project, but I have a terrible feeling this person really hopes to get the money.

Either way, isn’t it great that it’s now allowed on Kickstarter?!?

There’s even Free Energy Scams!


These fools and con-artists were once forced to use IndieGoGo. Not any more! Now they can use Kickstarter just like legitimate projects!

Punctuation is important


They really need a comma between “on” and “candy”.

It’s funny, because it’s a joke from a TV Show!

tension sheet
It was funny on Red Dwarf. It’s not funny when you do it.

Kickstarter has stopped enforcing their rules.


This person clearly has no idea how game controllers even work, so how did he make the prototype that kickstarter absolutely requires for all electronic gadgets? Oh, that’s right. He didn’t. And Kickstarter doesn’t care anymore.

We’ve got those already

 by Christopher Phillip Tucker  Trying to create a album full of repeating lyrics with great beats
Those are called “Songs”.

Is this racist?


Is this racist? Not the glow-in-the-dark Tee-Pees, because that’s a real part of our nation’s glow-in-the-dark history. I mean calling them “injian tee-pees”.

Snap Sporks

snapSpork

Snap … Sporks?

Basically this idea will allow you to: A) Wear a snap-on bracelet legitimately(ish) B) Eat, Rinse, Repeat :)

Oh. Of course. Next time I’m at an event, and need to eat something with a fork or spoon, I’ll just take the flexible band off my wrist and stick it in my food!

Snap bracelets, popular in the early 90s, and coming back into fashion now, are metal springs that wrap around your wrist, but can also be straightened into a roughly straight shape. And then, here’s the magic part, you apply just a liiiitle bit of pressure to them, and they SNAP! back into a curved spring.

Perfect for something I’m jabbing into my salad.

Anyway, when the meal is over, I’ll just take that spork, dripping with spaghetti sauce or salad dressing or whatever, and wrap it around my wrist.

The “No Touch” pen

The No Touch Pen ®, The Original Germ Defense Pen® -- Kicktraq Mini

The “No Touch” pen. With this amazing new invention, you don’t have to push the buttons on an ATM with your fingers, exposing yourself to germs!

Ok, we’ve seen this sort of thing here before, but it’s not a horrible idea.

They’ve got a photograph, but I won’t bore you with it. It’s a silver tube with a black rubber thing on the end.

Basically, what they’ve done here is take an ordinary phone/tablet stylus, the kind Amazon will sell you for pocket change, and written their name on it.

Not really an “invention” if you ask me, but at least it’ll be cheap, right? Right?

notouch_twentybucks_sameasintown
Ha ha! Nope.

Copycats are the worst.

ps_copyca_0

Yes! I’m aware of the potato salad project. STOP EMAILING ME ABOUT IT!

Seriously, long-time readers will know that these kinds of joke projects are nothing new. [1][2][3] They’re not even particularly creative. Just pick any random thing. Ask for money, and pretend that it’s adorable that you’re a grown man asking for lunch money.

I refuse to waste braincells researching how this one has managed to “go viral” and become wildly popular. However, now that it has we can count on an endless cavalcade of copy-cats.

I want to stress that these are not all the copy-cats. They’re not even all the ones I could find. Not even close. I just stopped when I got bored of taking screenshots.

(No clickable links because copycats are terrible.)


ps_copycat_ice_Cream2ps_copycat_chickparm

ps_copycat_mac_saladps_copycat_bed

ps_copycat_mashedps_copycat_pizza

ps_copycat_juiceps_copycat_burger2

ps_copycat_burgerps_copycat_ice_cream
ps_copycat_four

ps_copycat_spring_rollsps_copycat_rice

ps_copycat_milkshakeps_copycat_mac

I’ll bet Kickstarter is really feeling good about their recent decision to stop pre-screening projects before they go live!